Top 10 Tips For Parents of Picky Eaters

1. Ditch the “Just One Bite” Rule

Why it matters: Pressure backfires.

While it might seem harmless to encourage “just one bite,” this approach creates stress for many kids. The second they sit down, they know there’s an expectation they have to meet, which triggers resistance or anxiety. When a child feels safe, curiosity naturally follows. But when they feel watched or judged, their brain says: nope!

Instead of pushing a bite, try celebrating any interaction with food—even touching, smelling, or talking about it.

2. Focus on Connection Over Consumption

Meals are more than food—they’re a relationship.

The goal of mealtime isn’t just to fill a belly—it’s to build trust, connection, and communication. When your child senses that your love doesn’t depend on how much they eat, their body starts to relax. And relaxed bodies are more open to learning and exploring food!

Set aside a few minutes to just enjoy each other’s company, even if no food is touched.

3. Bring Play to the Table

Because play builds comfort.

Children learn best through play—it’s how they process the world. So bring that same spirit to food! You can create silly food stories (“Did the carrot go to space today?”), play hide-and-seek with items on the plate, or use tools like tongs, mini forks, or food games.

We have a really great resource called 101 Ways To Make Food Fun– it’s an ebook and comes with a bonus Fun ways to talk about food. This guide is unique because it touches on all level of food readiness and have verbiage for all ages. It’s for kids who will only look at food to kids who are tasting food and everything in between! The best part is it’s only $7 right now both both combined!

Don’t forget, even if you are engaging in a non-eating activity, it actually builds the foundation you need for get to the part where they are trying the food!

4. Model, Don’t Manipulate

Show them what curiosity looks like.

You don’t need to say “Mmm, this is soooo yummy” in a fake voice. But you can say:
“I’m not sure about this sauce either… but I’m going to try it on just one piece.”
Or: “Wow, that crunch surprised me!”

Children learn from what you do—not what you say. When you show genuine curiosity, they learn it’s okay to explore, too. Better yet, they learn that it’s okay for you to not love the food the first time you try it. Modeling and explaining your own thought process will help them to internalize it as well and prepare them for what they can do and say if they take a bite they don’t love. 

5. Watch the Liquid Calories

Drinks might be stealing their hunger.

Milk, juice, smoothies—these fill little bellies fast. When kids aren’t feeling true hunger signals, it’s harder for them to show interest in food. A good rule of thumb: no milk or caloric drinks within an hour of meals.

Let their natural hunger work for you, not against you.

Liquid calories can be sneaky. Unlike solid food, liquids tend to fill up the stomach more quickly, which can trick our bodies into thinking we’re not hungry. However, they often don’t provide the same long-lasting satisfaction as whole foods. For kids, this can be particularly problematic. When children fill up on sugary drinks or even seemingly healthy options like smoothies, they may not have the appetite for the nutritious meals you’ve prepared.

It’s important to be mindful of what drinks your child is consuming throughout the day. Many fruit juices, sodas, and even some smoothies, while they may seem like good alternatives to sweets, are packed with sugar. This sugar spike can lead to a quick burst of energy, but it won’t sustain your child for long, and they may find themselves hungry again soon after. In the meantime, they may have missed out on consuming important nutrients from whole foods.

How do liquid calories impact mealtime behavior?
When kids drink sugary or calorie-dense beverages, they might feel too full to eat a proper meal. The body processes liquids differently than solids, and because liquids don’t have the same time-intensive digestive process, the fullness doesn’t last. This means your child may turn down a meal in favor of more liquid or refuse food altogether because they’re already “full” from drinking.

In addition, consuming large amounts of juice or sugary drinks can disrupt a child’s natural hunger cues. Kids may start associating drinking with feeling full, and when it’s time for meals, they won’t feel hungry enough to eat. This can lead to them grazing or picking at their food rather than consuming a healthy portion of a meal.

6. Respect Sensory Needs

A food refusal might be a sensory “no.”

That mushy texture? That intense smell? It might not be about attitude—it might be sensory overload.

Pay attention to your child’s reactions. If they gag at certain textures or cover their ears at the blender, they may be hypersensitive to input. Once you understand their sensory profile, you can start making slow, supported changes that feel safe.

7. Set the Stage for Calm

Environment affects eating more than you think.

Is the room bright and chaotic? Is the TV on in the background? Sometimes picky eating is less about the food and more about the overstimulating environment.

Try dimmer lighting, calming music, or even letting your child bring a transition object (like a fidget or favorite toy) to the table. A calmer body = a calmer eater. 

We talk about how to make these gentles changes in our Mealtime Makeover course! 

8. Ditch the “Clean Plate Club” Mentality

Full doesn’t mean finished. Hunger isn’t linear.

For many generations, parents and caregivers have instilled the idea that children must finish everything on their plate, often as a way of ensuring they get all the nutrition they need. The “clean plate club” mentality can create unnecessary pressure on kids during mealtime and lead to unhealthy eating habits in the long term. While it’s important to encourage children to eat a variety of foods and enjoy their meals, pressuring them to finish everything on their plate can backfire in unexpected ways.

When children are pushed to eat past their hunger cues, they may learn to ignore their body’s signals, which can lead to disordered eating behaviors later in life. They may grow up thinking they need to eat everything in front of them, even if they’re already full. This creates an unhealthy relationship with food where eating becomes about obligation rather than listening to one’s natural hunger signals.

Furthermore, if a child is repeatedly told to clean their plate, they may become anxious about mealtime, knowing that they must eat everything, even if they don’t want to or if they’re already full. This can lead to a sense of frustration or resentment toward food, causing them to develop negative feelings about mealtimes.

Instead of emphasizing how much food your child eats, focus on offering them a balanced variety of healthy options. Make sure meals include a variety of proteins, fruits, vegetables, grains, and healthy fats, and let your child decide how much they want to eat. They’ll naturally gravitate toward the foods they need, especially if you model healthy eating habits yourself.

If they are hungry after finishing a portion, you can always offer seconds. This reinforces the idea that mealtimes are not about eating for the sake of eating, but about nourishing the body when it’s hungry. The goal should be providing a variety of options, letting them try new foods, and allowing them to stop eating when they feel satisfied.

Encourage your child to tune in to their bodies by saying things like:

• “How does your belly feel right now?”

• “It’s okay to stop when you feel done.”

We want to build intuitive eaters, not obedient ones.

9. Use Routines to Build Trust

Consistency helps nervous systems feel safe.

When meals happen at the same times each day, with the same rituals (washing hands, lighting a candle, music), your child knows what to expect. And when they know what to expect, they don’t feel the need to control as much. When it comes to establishing healthy eating habits for your child, one of the most important factors is consistency. Just like any other routine or behavior, consistency creates a sense of security and trust. This is especially true in mealtime routines. Children thrive when they know what to expect, and when parents consistently model positive behaviors around food, children feel safe and supported in exploring new eating habits.

Structure is soothing. Make it predictable, not pressuring.

10. Celebrate Curiosity, Not Compliance

Progress is not measured in bites.

If your child smelled a new food, touched it, or even talked about it—they’re growing. The brain builds tolerance and interest in small, safe steps. A child who feels seen and celebrated for being curious will return to the table again and again.

Keep cheering on the process, not just the product.

Final Thoughts

Changing the way you approach feeding doesn’t happen overnight. But with these 10 tips, you’re planting seeds that can grow into a lifelong healthy relationship with food—for both of you.

Remember: picky eating isn’t the problem. It’s the symptom. And once we start looking deeper—with compassion and curiosity—we begin to uncover the real path forward.

If this resonated with you, share it with a fellow parent or subscribe to my podcast for more insights like this.

👉 Want more support? Learn about my Mealtime Makeover Course designed to expand on these principles and help take your child from picky to confident—step by step.